In this story, a married couple is going through a separation due to the husband’s extramarital affair, which occurred in May. The husband decided to move 1.5 hours away to be with his mistress. During the separation, the husband promised to co-parent with his wife and to never abandon their two young children, a 3-year-old daughter and a 1-year-old son.
Initially, the husband made occasional visits to see the children, spending a few hours with them every few days. He also FaceTimed with the daughter between visits, although the frequency of these interactions started to decline. As time passed, the husband’s visits became less frequent, and he stopped FaceTiming with his daughter, who began to feel the absence of her father.
As time passed, it became evident that the husband had not visited his children since July 9th, has FaceTimed with his daughter only three times, and hasn’t shown any interest in his son. He has not contributed financially to their care, and the wife does not want financial support from him.
OP is deeply concerned about her children’s emotional well-being and their relationship with their father. She reaches out to her husband, asking him to call their daughter, who is distraught and misses him. The husband, however, is attending a music festival and tells the wife that he cannot talk until Monday. Now OP wants to know if would she be an A-hole for telling her husband to commit the relationship with his kids or just leave them alone.
1. OP and her husband are currently separated due to an affair he had back in May, he moved to a location which is 1.5 hours away from OP but he promised he would co-parent his kids and would never abandon them
2. OP said that at first, he would come and stay with the kids for a few hours and even Facetime her daughter close to bedtime but now the frequency of the visits and the calls have been declined
3. OP told viewers that he hasn’t asked OP about how they are doing and his interest has been dropped as he never replies beyond a heart reaction moreover, OP said he hasn’t contributed financially and OP said she doesn’t want his money
4. OP is kinda fed up with his behavior as it has been more than a week since he last called, OP daughter wanted to talk to her daddy so badly so OP texted him to ask if he could call but he said he was on a 4-day music festival and he won’t be able to talk.
5. Now OP wants to know whether she would be an A-hole if she told her husband to commit to talking to them regularly or to just stay absent
6. Moreover, OP told viewers that she makes 3x more money than him and can financially support the kids but she will look into the advice that people gave her.
7. This user suggested OP get legally involved otherwise this will become an emotional drain on OP trying to get him involved moreover, the user said OP is NTA.
8. Those poor kids deserve better to be honest
9. Kids get very sad and heartbroken when their parents cancel on them and issues like this can be a real problem when they grow up and realize everything
10. A sincere piece of advice for OP
11. A lot of people suggested OP on making this matter legally
12. OP is obviously and definitely NTA but the husband needs to realize this ASAP
13. A lot of people here suggested OP take child support as it would help the kids in the future
14. Maybe the kids can use it in the future
15. Being a father means getting involved in their children’s lives it doesn’t mean that you make a baby and don’t even care for them afterward
16. OP should actually consider this, what do you guys think?
17. When you have kids you can either parent or pay
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