Getting engaged to the person you love is a feeling that you can’t put into words.
You feel closer to your partner than ever. It shows seriousness and comittment. You guys are no longer dating at this point. It’s official and you are closer than ever to getting married. Families are involved, you have your loved one’s blessings and above all you are genuinely happy.
This is a time where you want and expect to feel special. You have every right to; it’s your big day. From your dress to the gathering at your ceremony, everything needs to be wonderful. However, if for some reason something doesn’t meet your expectations it can be really difficult to deal with.
That’s exactly what this girl felt when her fiance gave her an engagement ring she didn’t like. For the sake of love, she didn’t say a word to her fiance but deep down it really bothered her. So, she asked Redditors for advice.
Here’s what she said:
I’m no expert but that ring doesn’t look so special. I mean, for an occasion as big as engagement, I think he could’ve chosen something for appealing (for the same price). Then again, I’m no expert so, let’s see what ladies on Reddit had to say:
He should’ve put more effort.
Yea this is like a 50 dollar ring. It’s fine to not have money for a nice ring but it looks like he said give me the cheapest band and cheapest diamond and put zero effort into finding a nice looking cheap ring. It’s more of the combo no effort and ugly that makes it worse.
Maybe he just didn’t have enough money.
“I’m not materialistic when it comes to things like this but if my man proposed with THAT I would be full on insulted. There are nicer, more substantial rings than that for $200. He went out of his way to find the cheapest possible option; which to me says that he’s probably like that in every aspect of the relationship and will probably be like that in every aspect of their marriage. You can count on it.”
She’s got a good point.
Regardless of whether she likes the ring, if they’ve been talking about marriage for 3 years and this is what he was able to save for (possibility over the course of 3 years), unless her fiancé is living in poverty, it seems like this is a red flag regarding his ability to manage finances and save money, which is a major concern if you’re going to spend a lifetime with someone.
This shows a communication gap.
While I have no idea what this costs, it doesn’t look like a ring one would need to save up for. They have been talking about marriage for 3 years but have they gone window shopping for engagement rings? Have they discussed style, size and budget for the ring as well as a wedding? If not, she should gently let him know this is not her style and go with him back to the jeweler and show him what she would like. This will hopefully lead to a budget discussion and set priorities.
If she’s unhappy with it, she has every right to tell him. I don’t think being unhappy with her ring makes her ungrateful or anything. She should have communicated her expectations more clearly.
However, not everyone shared the same opinion.
I’d much rather have just a plain band than the diamond chip.
Because what I care about is him wanting to spend his life with me, not a diamond. Yes I have a diamond but that’s because we had the budget for one. I’d marry him in a potato sack with a ring pop.
It’s the thought that counts right?
My mother’s wedding band cost $10, which was tough for my dad at the time. And she treasures it more than her really expensive pieces. Once she thought she lost it and she cried when my niece found it.
This is quite a controversial topic, but if something disturbs the peace of your heart you should confront it.
What’s your say on this? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.