20 Polite But Still Savage Ways From Corporate Experts To Tell Off Your Coworkers Or Boss Without Getting In Trouble

Corporate slang is something that every employee should be familiar with.

What is corporate speak, you might ask? Corporate slang is a unique language used in the business world that can be confusing to newcomers. It is usually about what you don’t say and the underlying meaning of your polite words. Understanding and incorporating these terms and phrases into your vocabulary can help you navigate the workplace culture and form relationships with coworkers. Learning the nuances of corporate slang can help you achieve success and advance your career in a specific workplace.

I am sure we are all aware that it is necessary to be excessively polite at work, but what if your superiors or coworkers do not take you seriously? I understand how easy it is to become annoyed by this type of behaviour, and you may want to simply express your opinion. However, it is usually not a good idea, and you must be careful with your words. This is where corporate speak comes in. With this professional language, you can express yourself without jeopardising your job.

Scroll down to see some examples.

Source: Instagram

#1 To be honest, if you are quitting anyway, wouldn’t it be better to let loose and let them have a taste of your mind?

Via Edmond Dantès

This is how you say I f*****g quit because you’re a sh**ty manager, but in corporate.

• Fortunately, I’ve decided to pursue a new opportunity. While I’ve enjoyed most of my time here, I simply don’t feel I’ve had adequate enough support from either you or other members of leadership. I wish we could have found a way to make this work, but I simply don’t feel like there’s been enough time and commitment put into my own growth and development.
• While I’ve decided to take on a new opportunity,. I do want to give you feedback that your management style is one of the driving forces behind my departure. So I highly encourage you to take that into account for the next person. –Professor Corporate

#2 Some people think they know better than everyone else.

Via Karolina Grabowska

If somebody doesn’t know what the f**k they’re doing, are intentionally ignoring your instructions, you can say something like the following:

• If you’re somebody that’s struggling to get a raise or promotion, you could say your manager ‘help me understand what exactly it’ll take me to get to the next level.’
• Or if you know somebody is full of s**t, and you just don’t agree with them. You can say something like, ‘help me understand your thought process here because now they actually have to explain their rationale. If there was any. You know, because good employees give people the benefit of the doubt.’ –Professor Corporate

#3 We have all been in instances where we get requests that aren’t in our job description.

Via Antoni Shkraba

Here is how to say, “I don’t get paid to do your f*cking job” at work in corporate.

• I would love to continue helping, but my bandwidth no longer permits it.
• I wish I could help, but I’m currently occupied with other obligations that I’m directly responsible for.
• I’d love to help, but given that this falls outside of my scope of responsibilities, I’d love to make sure that we follow this up with a more formal conversation about how my role may evolve. This way, we can make sure that I’m being fairly compensated for tasks like this moving forward. –Professor Corporate

#4 People who don’t have the courage to say things to your face always talk behind your back.

Via The Coach Space

Here is how to say “keep my name out of your f*****g mouth” at work in corporate.

• Hey, thanks for catching up. It’s been brought to my attention that there have been a few side conversations where my name has been brought up, but I haven’t been looped in. So I thought we’d have a conversation directly.
• Help me understand your point of view because the only way we’re going to come to a resolution is if you speak with me directly.
• Moving forward, if you have any feedback about myself or the team, I would expect that you share it in the appropriate channels. –Professor Corporate

#5 Some people like to think they know it all and aren’t even willing to listen to your side.

Via Christina Morillo

This is how you say I don’t know who the f**k you think you’re talking to, but you better stop talking to me like I’m stupid. But in corporate.

• I’m not totally clear on why you’re sharing information that I’m already well aware of. So can you please elaborate?
• I appreciate the reminder. But have I given you any reason to suspect that I don’t
• have a handle on things, as I want to make sure there’s no miscommunication?
  If you have any feedback for me, it’s in both of our best interests for you to share it directly as I could help resolve any misunderstandings that you may have. –Professor Corporate

#6 Nobody likes a boss who micromanages everything and is always looking over your shoulder.

Via Mikhail Nilov

This is how you say, please stop micromanaging me, or else, but in corporate.

• If there’s anything that’s given you any indication that I need any additional supervision, please let me know so I can put your mind at ease.
• I appreciate your support, but I want to make sure that your time is better utilised. So feel free to roll off of this one.
• Huh, I guess I’m just a bit confused. I trust that when you hired me you understood that I was fully capable of handling this on my own. Unless of course, you’re questioning your own judgement. –Professor Corporate

#7 Sometimes it is necessary to tell your coworkers that they can go stuff themselves.

Via RDNE Stock project

This is how you say respectfully, Go f**k yourself, but in corporate.

• I’m sorry; it seems like we’re getting off track and I want to make sure that we’re making the most efficient use of everyone’s time. So can you trim out the extra details and focus only on the primary points?
• Your opinion isn’t one that’s actively being sought after at this point in time, but we’ll be sure to follow up should anything change.
• This requires a level of expertise that you’re not adequately equipped with. So while I appreciate your desire to be involved, your systems won’t be required at this time. –Professor Corporate

#8 No matter how hard you try, some people will always take you for granted.

Via Alexander Suhorucov

This is not to say that with all I do around here, you would think you’d f****g appreciate me a little more, but in corporate.

• Yeah, of course, I’d be happy to help. But before we do that, let’s make sure that we prioritise a conversation around how this aligns with my career growth.
• Could you help me understand whether the projects I’m currently working on are impactful? I only ask because I haven’t felt like there’s been much recognition, and I want to make sure I understand where that’s coming from.
• Please don’t mistake my willingness to take on more as a reflection of my own wants, if there isn’t proper acknowledgement moving forward, I will have to adjust accordingly. –Professor Corporate

#9 If you don’t have anything new to add, please don’t open your mouth in the first place.

Via Tima Miroshnichenko

This is how you tell someone to respectfully shut the f**k up. But in corporate.

• You seem to have quite a strong point of view for someone missing the necessary context.
• Your point of view is valued, but now’s not the time or place.
• If you’re going to speak over me, please ensure that there’s any substance that you plan to offer so as to not derail the conversation. –Professor Corporate

#10 Some companies will not give you a raise until you squeeze it out of them.

Via Gustavo Fring

This is how you say when the f**k are you giving me a raise, but in corporate.

• Hey, thanks for catching up. I wanted to have a conversation to discuss my performance. As you know, career growth is something that’s extremely important to me, and I wanted to discuss a potential timeline and make sure that we were on the same page.
• While I appreciate the added responsibilities, I’d love to understand the bigger picture of how and when this will translate into a more formal opportunity, either via a raise or a promotion.
• Hey, so it’s been a while since we had our initial conversation about performance and since then, I’ve either met or surpassed all expectations, I’d love to better understand how this will impact my compensation moving forward if I’m gonna stay committed. –Professor Corporate

The person in charge of educating the masses on corporate language is known as ‘Professor Corporate’, and they have a response to almost anything an employee may encounter in the workplace. While I don’t believe all of these responses are ‘polite’, and the vast majority of them may even get you in trouble, some of them are excellent examples of how to express yourself without appearing rude.

That is why it is not surprising that Professor Corporate has over 327 thousand Instagram followers, as people are clearly in need of assistance when it comes to workplace drama.

#11 There are people out there who think they can get away with anything as long as they throw someone else under the bus.

Via Andrea Piacquadio

This is how you say you better stop trying to throw me under the bus because you might get run over first, but in corporate.

• Before we jump into feedback, why don’t we recap everyone’s roles and responsibilities? This way, we can accurately allocate the feedback.
• Unfortunately, I’m not going to be able to work with you moving forward, but I’d be happy to reconsider as soon as you acknowledge and take ownership of your shortcomings.
• No, it’s totally understandable that you’re afraid of taking accountability, as it typically requires a level of maturity only obtained at more senior levels. And if it wasn’t already as obvious to the team, I might be a bit more concerned, but at this stage, I’m more concerned about your reputation. –Professor Corporate

#12 Not everyone is able to be a good manager, and they should realise that.

Via ANTONI SHKRABA production

This is how you say if you don’t f****g know how to be a good manager, just say that, but in corporate.

• I’d be happy to jump on this. But since there hasn’t been any formal training on this, do you mind walking me through it for the first time? You know, this way I can model it after someone who knows what they’re doing.
• I appreciate that you want to help, but I don’t actually need assistance on the task itself. But where I would need your support is to help unblock challenges that are outside of my control.
• It’s important for me to understand that my manager is invested in my career growth, and thus far I haven’t felt adequate support on that front as we haven’t had any career conversations. So moving forward, I’d like to ensure that this is something that we can prioritise. –Professor Corporate

#13 Raising your voice in a professional setting doesn’t make it seem like you are in the right.

Via Karolina Grabowska

This is how you say you better watch your f*****g tone when you talk to me but in corporate.

• Help me understand what you wish to accomplish by raising your voice.
• I understand that you believe you’re correct, but simply asserting so doesn’t make it so.
• If you want to be taken seriously, please check your emotions at the door, and then we can resume. –Professor Corporate

#14 You are not required to answer your phone while you are on vacation.

Via Armin Rimoldi

This is how you say sorry: I can’t come to the phone right now or answer any of your messages because I’m on vacation, but in corporate.

• Hey, just as a reminder, I’m heading out on PTO next week. So if there’s anything you need, please let me know now, as I’ll be fully off the grid.
• Hey, yeah, actually, I’m not going to be able to help with that. And I was just calling to say that I would greatly appreciate it if you gave me the space to fully disconnect as intended. Otherwise, I just won’t be able to operate at my best capacity upon my return. I appreciate your understanding in advance. –Professor Corporate

#15 Nobody likes being talked down to.

Via Sora Shimazaki

This is how to say I don’t know who the f**k you think you’re talking to, but you’re going to stop talking down to me but in corporate.

• Sure, I’d be happy to take a look, but I’m not going to be able to drop what I’m doing currently. So why don’t you go ahead and find some time on my calendar?
• I appreciate your point of view. But your experience doesn’t quite translate to what we’re working on.
• I respect that you’ve been here for a while. But the whole reason we’re in this predicament in the first place is that we haven’t had space for new ideas. So please allow others to speak, as you’ve had ample opportunity. –Professor Corporate

#16 It is fine to have your co-workers as friends, but not everyone will be open to that.

Via Gustavo Fring

This is how you say sorry, but I’m not your f****g friend but in corporate.

• So I’m not quite sure where the disconnect is, but our relationship outside of these walls is non-existent.
• Yeah, it’s just that in order for me to be most effective here, it’s important that we keep our relationship professional at all times, though we can revisit at some point in the future.
• I appreciate you sharing, I really do, but these are conversations that you should only feel comfortable sharing with friends or family, neither of which colleagues such as myself, fall under. –Professor Corporate

#17 Sometimes you have to tell it like it is so they stop jerking you around.

Via Tima Miroshnichenko

This is how you say Stop f**king with me because I promise you’re going to regret it in corporate.

• I couldn’t help but notice that you’ve been distributing work that you’re responsible for. And while I’d love to help, we’re going to have to realign.
• You seem to be under the impression that because I’m new, I want to voice my opinion, and I’d be more than happy to correct that misconception.
• Sharing your feedback publicly before coming to me directly shows an inability on your end to handle conflict, which is a common problem for more junior employees and I’d be more than happy to work with you on this area of development. –Professor Corporate

#18 Companies can be hubs of gossip, and there is sometimes a need to stop the rumour mill.

Via cottonbro studio

This is how you say Stop f*****g gossiping about me, but in corporate.

• I’m a bit confused about why I’m a topic of conversation for you, but if there’s anything you’d like to learn more about, my calendar is open.
• It doesn’t bother me. But I do want to make sure that you understand that spreading narratives that are verifiably untrue is only going to reflect poorly on you.
• It’s come to my attention that you’re the source of feedback that’s been circulating around me so I decided to book us a one-on-one so that we could address it directly in case you were too intimidated. –Professor Corporate

#19 You will always come across two-faced coworkers who seem so kind on the surface.

Via Sora Shimazaki

This is how you say I can see right through you, and you better stop being two-faced, but in corporate.

• You seem to have multiple narratives depending on who you’re speaking with, so help me understand the disconnect.
• In order to maintain credibility with me, you’re going to need to ensure that your point of view isn’t as fragile as it currently stands.
• You seem to have the habit of sharing information we’ve discussed in confidence with others, which is typically a sign of someone who is intellectually intimidated, and I apologise for that. It won’t happen again. –Professor Corporate

#20 Some people have a knack when it comes to manipulating things and making others look bad.

Via Anna Shvets

This is how you say you better f****g stop trying to make me look bad before we have a problem, but in corporate.

• There have been multiple occasions now where you’ve decided to speak out of turn, and I’d appreciate it if you gave me the respect and space to speak uninterrupted.
• If your plan is to continue to interject, make sure that your point of view isn’t just based on your feelings and is backed by facts.
• I hate to be the one to inform you, but your attempts to publicly criticise me won’t overcompensate for your lack of abilities. –Professor Corporate

What are your thoughts on the responses given above? Would you ever sue any of these, or do you think you would get into trouble if you did? Comment below to let us know, and don’t forget to share these with your friends so they can get some help with their jobs as well.