Hussain
In a world where values and norms are in a constant state of evolution, parenting often becomes a delicate dance of preserving tradition while embracing modernity. In this Reddit post, a married couple has been together for 18 years and has a 16-year-old daughter who is in a relationship with a shy, respectful young man. Despite both parents having shared values of feminism and equality, the wife’s perspective on relationships shifts when their daughter begins dating. She starts giving advice that aligns with traditional gender roles, suggesting that boys should pay for everything as a way of showing affection. This contradicts the husband’s belief in equal partnership and contribution in relationships.
The daughter takes her mother’s advice seriously and becomes increasingly entitled, expecting her boyfriend to cover her expenses. She even employs her mother’s advice to manipulate her boyfriend into buying her gift cards. Concerned about this behavior, OP privately discusses the issue with his wife. Unfortunately, the conversation escalates into a heated argument, with the wife accusing him of being an A-hole.
So keep on scrolling down below to dive deeper into this case and make sure to read it till the end. Otherwise, you won’t be able to know what really happened.
1. OP and his wife have been married for 18 years and they have a daughter who is currently dating a shy young man
2. OP thinks her daughter’s boyfriend is very nervous around her, and they also think that their daughter is way out of his league.
3. OP’s wife is an independent woman and they both have raised their daughter to be as independent and capable as possible
4. Since OP’s daughter has been dating this kid OP has been concerned about the bits of advice that his wife gave to her
5. OP heard his wife saying cute boy pays for everything and it’s your first relationship if he really likes then he can pay for you, this has been bothering OP.
6. OP told her daughter that two people who are in a relationship contribute equally
7. OP has been suspecting her daughter becoming entitled to her boyfriend’s money which is not right
8. OP spoke to her wife privately about the concern which has been bothering OP but it turned into a heated argument and she even called him an A-hole
9. NTA
10. What OP’s wife is encouraging her daughter to do is not ethical and it is even dangerous, obviously OP is not an A-hole here.
11. What if the wife was a boy’s parent instead of a girl’s? Would she still feel the same? I don’t think so. This user has got a solid point.
12. What she is teaching to her daughter is not gonna make her to make up in the long run, this can lead her to a couple of problems.
13. OP is NTA but his wife is an A-hole
14. This user suggest OP to talk to the boy and tell him he shouldn’t be obligated to pay for everything she asks him for
15. This could work
16. This is a fact
17. Exactly, that’s what my point is. Maybe she isn’t independent at all.
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